Anonymous Asked:
you look fucking stupid in a dress, DUDE

dajo42:

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come closer one second

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little closer

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okay close enough

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i have a simple question: which of us is wearing a crown?

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that would be me.

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do you know what this crown means?

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it means i look fucking cute

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and you’re the human embodiment of a sore butt

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now as your fucking queen, i royally declare

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that i am beautiful and you are a listerine enema

SNK Autocorrect AU

Mikasa: Eren, I won't be home in a while. Tell your mom.
Eren: Oh, okay.
Eren: Can I ask what you're doing?
Mikasa: I'm with Jean. We're just gonna bang for a while.
Eren: TMI, MIKASA.
Eren: I DIDN'T NEED TO KNOW THAT.
Eren: I AM NOT TELLING THAT TO MY MOM.
Mikasa: SHIT!
Mikasa: I meant hang.
Mikasa: This phone hates me more than Leonhardt.
Eren: Permission to throw your phone in the trash when you get home?
Mikasa: Permission granted.
---OOO---
Mina: I went shopping with Annie yesterday, that's why I didn't pick up.
Marco: Ah, okay. What did you get?
Mina: Not much really, it was a slow day. But at least I managed to get some new boobs that go with that top I found in the back of my closet.
Marco: Uhhhhh.... what?
Marco: How is that possible?
Marco: Don't you need a waiting list or something?"
Mina: No wait required. Besides, it was a two for one sale, and Annie made a very convincing argument to make me fork out the cash.
Marco: Darling, you might want to look at the last few texts.
Mina: OMG.
Mina: I MEANT BOOBS.
Mina: *BOOKS
Mina: LEATHER FOOT COVERAGE THAT GOES UP TO THE MID-CALF.
---OOO---
Sasha: I'm bored. Come over.
Connie: I can't, you're too fat.
Connie: *FAR. YOU ARE NOT FAT AT ALL!
---OOO---
Ymir: If I don't get home by 11, my aunt Ilse's gonna dismount me.
Ymir: *DISOWN.
Ymir: MY AUNT IS GONNA DISOWN ME.
---OOO---
Armin: My mirror hates my face.
Annie: I think your face is nice.
Annie: Especially those nipples on your cheeks.
Armin: Wat?
Annie: *DIMPLES. FUCK. I MEANT DIMPLES.
askinternetbrause:

greenlight6:

momomisfortune:

My new shirt from askinternetbrause and greenlight6.
I said this drunkenly at Colossalcon and they will never let me forget that I said it. It’s even on video. And now I have it on a t-shirt.

I’ve never been more proud of myself

Perf

askinternetbrause:

greenlight6:

momomisfortune:

My new shirt from askinternetbrause and greenlight6.

I said this drunkenly at Colossalcon and they will never let me forget that I said it. It’s even on video. And now I have it on a t-shirt.

I’ve never been more proud of myself

Perf

Feel free to ask

January: sexuality/preferences
February: city/state
March: favourite colour
April: favourite hair colour & favourite eye colour
May: favourite manga & favourite anime
June: favourite book
July: favourite song/band
August: crush names
September: instruments I play/ want to play
October: favourite game
November: if I changed my name, what would it be
December: random fact about me :)

"

MUSIC ASKS

1: A song you like with a color in the title
2: A song you like with a number in the title
3: A song that reminds you of summertime
4: A song that reminds you of someone you would rather forget about
5: A song that needs to be played LOUD
6: A song that makes you want to dance
7: A song to drive to
8: A song about drugs or alcohol
9: A song that makes you happy
10: A song that makes you sad
11: A song that you never get tired of
12: A song from your preteen years
13: One of your favorite 80’s songs
14: A song that you would love played at your wedding
15: A song that is a cover by another artist
16: One of your favorite classical songs
17: A song that would sing a duet with on karaoke
18: A song from the year that you were born
19: A song that makes you think about life
20: A song that has many meanings to you
21: A favorite song with a person’s name in the title
22: A song that moves you forward
23: A song that you think everybody should listen to
24: A song by a band you wish were still together
25: A song by an artist no longer living
26: A song that makes you want to fall in love
27: A song that breaks your heart
28: A song by an artist with a voice that you love
29: A song that you remember from your childhood
30: A song that reminds you of yourself

Seriously do this … or I will just do it myself…

"

(via allkillernofiller)

(Source: candyqueenbitch, via lieutenantbitch)

Reblog And See What People Want From You!

askboxmemes:

1. A baby
2. A second chance
3. Sex
4. Kiss
5. Friendship
6. To chill
7. To cuddle
8. A long term relationship
9. A good laugh
10. An apology
11. A hug
12. Be my bitch
13. Be my sex buddy
14. Simply to be mine
15. MY BED. NO CLOTHES. NOW.

(via ask-queen-mikasa)

strivingking:

When you’re feeling down and out, REAL friends be like

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(via ahorsefacejean)